Rain Drops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens

My little sister Johanna started a blog recently and reminded me that I have not blogged here in quite some time. So in order to catch people up on what I've been up to I thought I'd post a list of some of my current favorite things.


1- Bowling. I had forgotten how much I love bowling until I recently began going again with my friend Jason. I'm not the greatest bowler, but I'm not too bad either. I feel like it's an actual sport that I can relate to and actually excel in if I wanted to. It's awesome. We go to Fat Cats when they have Thunder Alley since you can pay ten bucks for a whole hour of bowling. With just two of us we usually can get in about 4 to 5 games in that hour. It's awesome.

2- This song and music video. I know Katy Perry can get overplayed but I love it and listen to it like crazy.





3- Kurt Vonnegut. I've now read 3 of his novels: Cat's Cradle, Slaughterhouse-Five, and The Sirens of Titan. Well, I'm half way through the third and loving it. He's a science fiction writer of a sort with his own fascinating and strange way of telling the story. It takes some adjusting to understand the humor and style of his story telling. He's one of the best examples of satire that I've read and really easy to read.

4- 21 Jumpstreet. My friend Ben introduced me to this horribly amazing show from the late 80's and early 90's a while ago. Then I found season 1 for like five bucks at Walmart and just had to buy it. It is so fun to watch. The clothes remind you of how strange fashion was back then with denim everything, mullets on guys, and bangs up the wazzoo on girls. What were people thinking.  There is also a strong propaganda overtone for teenagers, sometimes to the point of bluntness. The acting is not good, even with Johnny Depp, but you know their trying and you cannot help but laugh. It's one of those shows you watch to make fun of. It's so bad that its good to watch.

5- And I know it's cliche and cheesy, but lastly is my amazing friends and family. You all make my life better and I love all of you. I would go crazy without all of you. I'm such a social person. I hope you all know and feel how much I appreciate everything you do.


Well, that's what I'm loving right now. Enjoy.

Quotable Quotes

In a few days I will be graduating from Utah Valley University with a BA in English. I'm really excited.

This is the announcement for my graduation that my wonderful sister Louise made. I was really impressed. In making the announcement my mother wanted to have a nice quote of some kind on the invitation. She sent some suggestions and had me look for others. I really struggled with this. I felt as if any quote on my announcement was suppose to summarize my education experience so far. What a difficult task, to sum up four years of my life into a few simple words. Anyway, we ended up not using a quote due to lack of space on the card. But I didn't want all my searching to go to waste so I thought it'd be fun to share the few that I found. They might come in handy to someone else.

These are the three my mother sent me:
Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved. - William Jennings Bryan

To reach a great height a person needs to have great depth. - Anonymous

When a man feels throbbing within him the power to do what he undertakes as well as it can possibly be done, this is happiness, this is success. - Orison Swett Marden

And these are the ones I found myself:
"Books swept me away, this way and that, one after the other; I made endless vows according to their lights for I believed them" - Annie Dillard

"There comes a time in a man’s life when to get where he has to go, if there are no doors or windows, he must walk through a wall." - Bernard Malamud

"The dedicated life is the life worth living. You must give with your whole heart." - Annie Dillard

"You've got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down." - Annie Dillard

"This is an interesting planet. It deserves all the attention you can give it." - Marilynne Robinson

"There are a thousand thousand reasons to live this life, everyone of them sufficient" - Marilynne Robinson

"The world, even the smallest parts of it, is filled with things you don't know." - Sherman Alexie

"If you're good at it, and you love it, and it helps you navigate the river of the world, then it can't be wrong." - Sherman Alexie

"Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days." - Flannery O'Connor

"At some point in life the world's beauty becomes enough. You don't need to photograph, paint, or even remember it. It is enough." - Toni Morrison

And these  two are jokes:
"I am grateful for all those dark years, even though in retrospect they seem like a long, bitter prayer that was answered finally." - Marilynne Robinson

"Why do we people in churches seem like cheerful, brainless tourists on a packaged tour of the Absolute?" - Annie Dillard

An Ethical Dilemma

What do you do when your pet Beta Fish is suicidal? Yup, you heard right, I think Rupert is trying to kill himself. I haven’t actually seen him attempt it, but occasionally I hear a large splash in his bowl and when I look over he’s bobbing around as if he has tried to jump out of the water. He currently isn't in any really danger; it would be a miracle if he could jump high enough to get out of the bowl. But the whole thing concerns me. It started the other day after I had cleaned and changed the water in his bowl. You’d think he’d be happier, but instead he’s doing this. To be honest, this isn't the first time he’s tried. Probably around six or seven months ago he was doing the exact same thing. I just don’t know what to do to help him. I’d get him a companion of some sort, but he’d probably kill it (it’s his fighting fish instincts and all). I just hope he gets better. I’d welcome any advice on the subject.

Sandwich Anyone?

This is my first endorsement for a product, and I have to say, it’s totally worth checking out.

The Sandwich: one of the most common and delicious lunch foods available. It’s one of the foods that has defined America. They’re one of the easiest things to make; you take a slice of bread, add whatever you could possibly feel like at the time, and top it all off with another slice. This simple recipe has created millions of possibilities. Every once in a while when I’m fed up with fatty burgers and fries, gassy inducing burritos and tacos, or cheesy greasy pizzas I realize that all I want is a simple and light sandwich. Whenever I get in this mood there is one sandwich shop that instantly comes to my mind. Tucked into the strip mall on the corner of State and University Pkwy in Orem is Sensuous Sandwich.

When you enter Sensuous Sandwich you know you’re entering a local shop. Everything seems to tell you that the sandwich experience is highest in priority. Their sandwiches are outstanding. With names like The Stimulator, The Bodacious, and The Super Saucy you know that these are going to be amazing. In actuality these sandwiches are really simplistic. It’s basically a hogi roll cut to various sizes from 4” to 24” according to how much you can eat (I prefer to order twice as much as I can and take the remainder home for later) then various meats, cheeses, and toppings according to your fancy and pallet. If you don’t see a sandwich you like you can always order The Figmentation which is whatever sandwich concoction you can imagine.

From what I’ve describe so far this could easily seem like a general Subway or Hogi Yogi, but there is something amazing about these sandwiches that’s hard to really pin down. I’ve tried many of their sandwiches and it’s as if each slice of bread, or topping, or sauce is infused with deliciousness.

Take for instance my favorite sandwich The Super Saucy. Their menu describes it as Roast Beef Smothered in Barbecue Sauce with Your Choice of Cheese. Sounds simple enough, but I cannot begin to explain how amazing this sandwich really tastes. First off for my choice of cheese I go with either Jack cheese, or Cream Cheese. Yes, that’s right, you hear me cream cheese. Since it’s served hot you get all that gooey cheesiness to smother every bit of the rest of the sandwich. Right in with the amazing cheese is their outstanding barbecue sauce. Man if I could order this sauce by the gallon to smother over everything I ate I would order it today. I wish I had at least a recipe for this sauce (I don’t dare ask them for it for fear that I might find out it’s a bottled sauce). The sauce is very sweet with just the right amount of barbeque punch to it. It makes the rest of the sandwich complete (Just thinking about it is making me crave the second half of my sandwich sitting in the fridge from this afternoon’s trip to the shop). 

I’m gonna be upfront with you. This is neither the nicest looking sandwich shops nor the prettiest sandwiches I’ve ever eaten. They don’t add any extra frills, but with outstanding service and delicious food it’s no wonder I cannot keep myself away from the Sensuous Sandwich. 

Poetry

This last Christmas I received two gifts that, until today, have been under-appreciated. From my good friend I received 101 Famous Poems and from Santa I received the two volume set American Poetry: The Twentieth Century. This weekend I was feeling a bit melancholy or pensive. While in this mood I decided it was about time to crack open those books. I rarely get to read anything for pleasure and since poems are generally shorter than novels I thought I'd give it a shot. Wow! I really loved delving into these poems. I have to say that I even took the poems to church and sneaked reading them in between the lulls. It was while reading Robert Frost's poems that I re-stumbled upon one of my favorite poems The Tuft of Flowers. I know I have shared this poem with some of you before individually, but here it is again. 

The Tuft of Flowers by Robert Frost

I went to turn the grass once after one

Who mowed it in the dew before the sun.

The dew was gone that made his blade so keen

Before I came to view the levelled scene. 

I looked for him behind an isle of trees;

I listened for his whetstone on the breeze. 

But he had gone his way, the grass all mown,

And I must be, as he had been,--alone, 

`As all must be,' I said within my heart,

`Whether they work together or apart.' 

But as I said it, swift there passed me by

On noiseless wing a 'wildered butterfly, 

Seeking with memories grown dim o'er night

Some resting flower of yesterday's delight. 

And once I marked his flight go round and round,

As where some flower lay withering on the ground. 

And then he flew as far as eye could see,

And then on tremulous wing came back to me. 

I thought of questions that have no reply,

And would have turned to toss the grass to dry; 

But he turned first, and led my eye to look

At a tall tuft of flowers beside a brook, 

A leaping tongue of bloom the scythe had spared

Beside a reedy brook the scythe had bared. 

I left my place to know them by their name,

Finding them butterfly weed when I came. 

The mower in the dew had loved them thus,

By leaving them to flourish, not for us, 

Nor yet to draw one thought of ours to him.

But from sheer morning gladness at the brim. 

The butterfly and I had lit upon,

Nevertheless, a message from the dawn, 

That made me hear the wakening birds around,

And hear his long scythe whispering to the ground, 

And feel a spirit kindred to my own;

So that henceforth I worked no more alone; 

But glad with him, I worked as with his aid,

And weary, sought at noon with him the shade; 

And dreaming, as it were, held brotherly speech

With one whose thought I had not hoped to reach. 

`Men work together,' I told him from the heart,

`Whether they work together or apart.' 

(Not my image)

I really love the message in this poem. To be honest this poem mostly comes to mind those many hot summer days that I mow my parents lawn. For those of you who didn't see my parent's back yard last summer, my dad kept mowing around a small patch of wildflowers that had sprung up in the middle of the lawn. I thought of that poem and decided to continue to mow around them as well. But, this poem has spiritual and social aspect to it too. I have had a great experience re-realizing that I do not have to go through life alone. That there are people around me and people I do not see who impact my life for good and make the world as a whole a better place to be in. 

Stars

I took a walk tonight. It was 10:30 and I just had an urge to go out and walk around the neighborhood; it’s something I do sometimes. So I put on a hoodie and grabbed a flashlight from my car, just in case. It was a really beautiful night. The air was crisp and cool. There is something so wonderful about the breeze gently brushing against my cheeks as I walked, and the warmth of a good hoodie to bundle up in. The trees were barren of leaves and there were small patches of snow in places. It felt like a brisk autumn instead of an early spring. I took a deep breath and inhaled the smells of the cool night air. It invigorates my senses.

I don’t really know what prompted this walk, I just left my house and started walking, letting myself go wherever on a whim. I often bring along my ipod to listen to music, or an audio book, but tonight I was just enjoying the silence. I walked through the neighborhood absorbing the stillness. The sounds of my breathing and footsteps seemed to puncture the calm of the night air. I’d stop from time to time to take in the noises of nature. I could hear someone’s wind chimes in the distance as the sound of the breeze whispered through the trees. I really felt at peace as I kept walking.

As it sometimes happens, I ended up in Rock Canyon again. (You all might be sick of me talking about this canyon but for me it’s nice to have a place where I can go and be alone and think. I think that being in nature inspires me to write.) At the mouth of the canyon is a small outdoor theater; It’s simply a few benches and a cement platform. I decided to sit down on a bench and gaze at the stars. The moon was nowhere to be seen and the lights from the city drown out most of the stars in the night sky, but still as I gazed up I could clearly see the big dipper right between the two rock walls of the canyon. There I was feeling, hearing, and smelling such a wonderful night, and as I stared at the stars I suddenly I felt a disconnect from this nature experience. Ever since I got glasses when I was fifteen I’ve always felt like I wasn’t able to fully enjoy staring up at the stars. Although everything else looks clear to me with my glasses, the stars always seem out of focus and distant. It’s probably all in my head, but I remember times before my glasses when the stars felt so wonderful. Looking at the stars tonight reminded me of a trip to Snow Canyon in southern Utah and actually being able to see the purple and blue hues of the Milky Way. I also remembered many summer nights as a child sleeping out on our trampoline and gazing up at the stars and learning about the different constellations. The stars seemed so close and personal then. I think that as I have grown older I’ve neglected the stars more and more. Even without the moon tonight the stars offered all the light I needed. They offer me a glimpse into mighty expanse of space, and testify of the power, wonder, and awe of nature.

As I walked home from the canyon and thought about all that had transpired tonight, a song popped into my head. It’s from the musical Songs for a New World. The chorus goes:

"I'll give you stars and the moon and the open highway

And a river beneath your feet

I'll give you days full of dreams if you travel my way

And a summer you can't repeat.

I'll give you nights full of passion and days of adventure,

No strings, just warm summer rain."

-"Stars & the Moon" by Jason Robert Brown

Like the woman in the song I don’t want to grow old and realize that all that I have with me are material possessions. There is so much more that Nature can offer to my life, if I let it.

Discontent

“Now is the winter of our discontent” this is the famous line that begins Shakespeare’s Richard III.

How fitting is it of Shakespeare to pair winter with discontent. With all the snow on the ground and the leaves and flowers hidden beneath a blanket of white; winter is painted with a pallet of brown, white, and grays, with just the occasional hint of green. Lately the weather has been teasing us; giving us just a taste of what spring will afford, and then covering it all over again with a blanket of white. Don’t get me wrong, I love winter. I love the feeling of warmth in my bed when I know it’s surrounded by the cool winters morning. I love the traditions of winter as my family goes hiking through the woods to hunt for the perfect Christmas tree. And I love the exhilaration that comes from hurling down a hill with nothing between you and the ground but a thin sheet of plastic. But I’m done with all that now. I AM filled with discontent. I want spring to come so I can see the world transform from the dull pallet of winter to the vibrant rainbow of spring.

Winter is now in the stage where the snow is all soggy and slushy and I don’t really want to go outside anymore, so today I decided to get off my butt and go walk around. I decided to go take a small walk back up Rock Canyon. I went there in the fall a few times and have avoided it in winter because of the snow. It was actually a really nice day today. There was just a little chill, but I wore my coat. I didn’t have my normal camera so I thought I’d test out my new phone’s camera and see what kind of shots I could get. I’m actually really impresses with the pictures I got.

So, in order to further chase away this feeling of discontent I share my photos with all of you, my readers. I hope you enjoy them.

Opp...I forgot to mention, I grew a beard this winter as well.

Like I said before, there's not a lot to see in Winter, so I tried to focus on what I could.

Oh I almost forgot, I was walking along the path and I noticed that there was a trail up the side of this hill. It looked as though it lead to a cave. 

I debated whether to rekindle my childhood and go and explore the cave, or to shy away knowing what shady things can go on inside a cave. I finally climbed up and had a look around. The cave was very shallow but it had a really nice view. So a snapped a few pics.

And back to the trail for one last picture.

Technology! (fist shaking in the air)

So I just got a new smart phone the other day (this was written on my phone BTW). I was so excited that I spent practically a whole day just exploring it. Now I'm in sacrement trying to concentrate and all I can think about is my new phone, how horrible is that. It makes me really think about technology and how it both makes life more convenient while also more complex. The real question is whether I really need more complexity in my life? The Gospel centers on simple truths and doctrines. Shouldn't I be patterning my life after that instead of a complex world of technology. I know that is is ridiculous to escape technology, but at least I'm aware of the situatuion. That's at least something.

1 Corinthians 14:10 "There are, it may be, so many kinds of voices in the world, and none of them is without signification."

What does being aware of something do to us? And can/will the holy ghost work with us to bypass the noise of our own technology? These are questions I've been pondering lately. I really don't know the answers though. I guess it's something for me to continue to work on. Yay! Another goal and concept for me to work on! (Sarcastic Voice). No, but this is important and can be good for me to understand.

Compassion for the Self

My perspective of myself had changed lately. The other day I was driving to school filled with all my worries and saying to myself how much I hated my life right now. Suddenly a spoken line came into my mind from a song I had listened to a week before. It says, “So I was sitting at the bar and this guy came up to me and said ‘my life stinks’ and I saw his gold credit card and I saw the way that he was looking at people across the room and I looked at his face and you know…what a good looking face, and I just said ‘dude, your perspective on life sucks!’” (Blame it on the Girls---Mika). I realized that my perspective on life sucks. I had been dwelling in self pity instead of giving myself a break---Finals week can do that to you---I really do have so much to offer the world. I've come to realize I don’t need to lump negativity on myself. I’m beginning to allow myself to work out the issues that have been bothering me instead of letting them fester. But the biggest change I’ve made is simply not allowing me to think the phrase “I hate my life” or “my life sucks.” I don’t really mean them anyway, they just became a habit. This small difference has changed my outlook and actions. I’m beginning to tackle issues instead of worrying about them. I really am making a change in my perspective.

Laughter- The Best Medicine

I don’t know why, but I’ve always gotten great pleasure from chaotic or frustrating circumstances. For example, when I was a child and I had done something wrong, my mother would find me and explain what I did and how it had hurt others Instead of being scared, defiant, or sorrowful as most other children would, I would laugh. This may sound crazy, and I don’t know exactly what I was thinking at the time, but there was something about the situation that always made me laugh. Don’t for an instance assume that I didn't regret what I had done, or that I found pleasure in my disobedient actions. It just that, in that moment when my mom was frustrated and mad, and the chaos of the situation was overwhelming everyone and everything, I couldn't help but laugh. Instinctively I'd find anything in the moment to find funny and have a good time with it. My mom would get so frustrated when I did this. She'd yell at me, "Don't laugh when I'm trying to punish you!" which of course, made me laugh even harder. Obviously I have grown up since then, but I have still retained that ability in the face of chaos to laugh in order to cope with the situation.

Unconditional Love

I'm reading The Maytrees by Annie Dillard and she quotes a poem that really stuck out to me. As the character Lou looks into her son's eyes these words come to her mind. I thought they were very beautiful and poignant.


"...if I don't talk about your hair, your lips, your eyes,
still your face that I keep within my heart,
the sound of your voice that I keep within my mind,
the days of September rising in my dreams,
give shape and colour to my words, my sentences,
whatever theme I touch, whatever thought I utter."
-CP Cavafy, December, 1903


I just thought I'd share it with y'all. Hope you enjoy it. 

My Grandmother

I feel like writing in a fancy voice tonight. I don’t know why exactly, but I think it’s rather enjoyable and refreshing.

Tonight I had a really great time getting to know my Grandma Hofheins. She’s been sick of late and since I live beneath her I try to check in on her from time to time. This evening as I was going out I ran into her neighbor and best friend Nancy, who was leaving my grandma’s front porch. She was wearing a robe and slippers, her usual attire. Nancy had gone to visit with her and my grandma didn’t answer. There were lights on in the house and she thought maybe she’d fallen asleep and forgotten about the lights. I thought it’d be a good thing if my grandma had fallen asleep since she’d been sick. I reassured Nancy that I would check on my grandma when I got back and turn off the lights if she were sleeping.

When I got back about a half hour later I noticed the lights were still on. I went upstairs and found my grandma in the kitchen. She was surprised to see me and told me she had just recently woken up. This was at 10 pm. She had taken a nap at 3pm and slept the whole afternoon. She didn’t have her hearing aids in so she couldn’t hear Nancy at the door. I asked about her health and we began to have a very pleasant conversation. I really love talking to my grandma; she gets very lively and we laugh and talk about our lives and things. It’s really been fun to see and talk to her more since I moved down below her.

She had a little game of cards with questions on it on her counter. I asked her about it and she said it was given to her by my Aunt Debbie but my grandma had never played it. I thought it’d be fun to ask these “getting to know you” type questions to my grandma. Although I’ve known her my whole life I really don’t think I could answer many of those questions about her. I recently had a discussion in one of my classes about how you can know a person your whole life and think that you really know them, yet they can always surprise you.

Anyway, it was really fun to talk to my grandma and to hear her stories about the vacations they went on as a family, and how she met my grandpa. It turns out that the luckiest thing that ever happened to my grandma was catching her first glimpse of my grandpa hiding under a table in school. She couldn’t remember why he was hiding under the table, but she knew then that she wanted to meet him. As it turns out, it was my grandma who asked my grandpa to a girl’s choice dance as their first date. In fact, she said she had to ask him to three more dances before grandpa had asked her on a date. I thought that was just so cute, and it says a lot about the strength of my grandma.

I really enjoyed sharing with her some of my experiences too. We both took turns answering each question. She really became interested in what I had been learning about in school. I was able to share with her some of the things I’ve enjoyed, specifically in my Chaos and Compassion Literature class. I had recently read Holy the Firm by Annie Dillard. In it Annie Dillard talks about God and our relationship to him. It addresses the age old question of “why do bad things happen to good people” and how we can be sanctified by our trials and grief to find joy in life. She was interested so I got the book and read some passages and we talked about what it all meant. It was really amazing to get my grandma’s perspective on things.

One passage that we enjoyed says:

"Every day is a god, each day is a god, and holiness holds forth in time. I worship each god, I praise each day splintered down, splintered down and wrapped in time like a husk, a husk of many colors spreading, at dawn fast over the mountains split…I open my eyes. The god lifts from the water. His head fills the bay. He is Puget Sound, the Pacific; his breast rises from pastures; his fingers are firs; islands slide wet down his shoulders… Today’s god rises, his long eyes flecked in clouds. He flings his arms, spreading colors; he arches, cupping sky in his belly; he vaults, vaulting and spread, holding all and spread on me like skin."

Although this is about the sunrise and greeting a new day it reminded my grandma of the sunsets that she loves to see from her window; the rays of light shooting into the sky and reflecting off the mountains. It was really cool to hear my grandma talk about these things. Mostly it was nice to just sit and talk to her on equal level. I increased my love and admiration for her today. 

Squaw Peak

So the other day I got into a conversation with my sister about my social habits. She couldn’t understand that I rarely, if ever, prefer to be alone. I love being with people. That being said, I’ve realized that there are some things that are best done alone. Today, for instance, I decided to go on a drive up the canyon to the Squaw Peak overlook. Now, obviously people go there for other “activities,” but I just love the scenery. It’s so amazing up there and I went up rather spontaneously. 

After going to the peak I drove up to some campgrounds and along the way I got to see some of the most beautiful scenes. There’s something great about not being able to see the city and submersing yourself into the nature around you.

So here’s a little history about the peak: Squaw Peak is said to take its name from an incident following an 1850 battle between Mormon settlers and Ute Indians led by Big Elk. When the chief was slain, many in his band fled into Rock Canyon. Big Elk's wife died when she fell off a slippery cliff during the winter escape.

It was still sort of raining when I began the drive up, but I thought it’d make for some great color contrasts. The different colors of leaves really stuck out amidst the post rain midst. And as the sun came out and the rain stopped it made some great light effects.

What really surprised me was how the mist from the rain caused the clouds to swirl around and cover the mountains. It was magnificent. 

I even got to see some animals. I saw three wild turkeys. They ran across the path and I couldn’t get a picture in time. And I saw four deer. Two of them let me get really close as I drove past them. We were probably like ten feet away from each other. 

I ended the drive by going back to the lookout. It was amazing. The sun was poking through and shinning down on the city. There was no one else around and it was great to just lookout and think about my life and the beauty I was witness to. I really was a great moment. I hope everyone takes an opportunity like this to reacquaint themselves with nature. It’s a beautiful thing.

Perceptions

So I was writing a paper tonight about Nietzsche and the way that words are perceived and understood in the world. I use an example from my childhood. It's a little weird to understand but can raise a lot of interesting questions and points so I thought I'd share an excerpt from my paper with you. Let me know what you think and if it made sense. Here goes:

(Not my Photo)

As I was trying to understand this concept it reminded me of some ideas I had when I was probably fourteen years old. I was very interested in the way in which people see things- their sense of vision and how that is interpreted and expressed to each other. I had recently done a career research paper on ophthalmologists and read how they examined the eyes and performed eye surgeries. In my research I learned how one actually is able to see things, the image being translated in the eye and then sent as a visual electric stimulus to the brain. At one point I began to wonder if everyone saw the world exactly as I did. For example, say I am looking at the sky and I see the color “blue” as signified by its hue, saturation, and brightness, and a friend of mine is also looking at the sky and seeing what he calls “blue.” I wondered if I were to switch consciousness with him in some way so that I could see out his eyes yet translate the color with my own brain would I still identify that color as “blue” or would it suddenly appear to have a different hue, saturation, and brightness so that I would call it turquoise or even green. As a fourteen year old I came to terms with the fact that I would probably never know if my theory was true, but I never forgot how intriguing it was to try to understand another’s perceptions of reality. I think this is what Nietzsche is trying to express.

On Friendships

So I’ve been thinking a lot about friendships lately, how they’re defined, what they entail, and what you can get and receive out of them. It’s been really interesting to look back and see the many different types of relationships we have.

One of the most interesting things for me are these Facebook Friends that everyone has too many of. I mean, I am actually taking the time (just one simple click…but still) to say that ‘yes this person is my friend. I want them to be able to keep in touch with me and see what is going on in my life.’ The only problem is that these Facebook friends can range from my sisters and brothers to the person in one of my classes that I talk to every once in a while. There are no real electronic distinctions between the two. Honestly if I hardly know the person I’ll just contemplate if I get a positive feeling about them, and if so I accept their invite (I don’t normally add people I don’t really know). I have exactly 554 friends on Facebook but I probably only hang out with like 20 of them on a regular basis. And those ones I really don’t need to be Facebook friends with since I know what’s going on in their lives. It’s just interesting.

Now that I’m done with my Facebook rant there are other things I find intriguing about real friends. We all know that friends are extremely important to us. They make up a large part of our emotional lives. Yet different people seem to treat their friendships differently. For example, I love to share my friends. If I have someone that I love I want them to meet other people that I also love. I like them to get to know each other, and if there are differences between two friends I will share them with other friends instead. I love large groups of friends. But there are other people I know who seem to hoard their friendships. It’s not that I think this is bad; it’s just that I don’t understand this. People hoard their friends when they cannot mix friendships with others and groups. They have different groups that they hang out with and it’s not that they can’t have their friends mix, they just don’t think to do it, or would prefer not to mix friendships. This just frustrates me because I don’t understand why they wouldn’t want to share their friendships, and it can cause feelings of exclusion.

Anyway I don’t want to ruffle anyone’s feathers with this. It’s just something I noticed and have been thinking about lately.

Chaos and Compassion

So I'm in a class called Themes in Literature: Chaos and Compassion and I thought I'd share some thoughts on the subject.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the chasm where chaos and compassion meet; the mixing ground for the two opposing slopes. I feel like that is where change, growth, life happens. They’re linked, chaos and compassion. The chaos will either cause destruction or construction to us. And the compassion is what helps us to get through it, grow from it, and find joy in it. It’s when we are stagnant that we’re not embracing both sides of the spectrum, and that we aren’t really living.

This is what life is. This is how we deal, by allowing both forces into our lives. Otherwise we’re boring people. We’re not living, we’re just being. I think we are not meant to sit still, we are rising and falling and that is life. It’s taken me a while to relearn this and my chaos is not as great as others but I’m learning to embrace it and hold on for the ride.

What Kind of Bread is This?

So often, when I'm bored, I try to think about what it is that I could post here on my blog. I usually come up with a great idea- The only problem is I'm usually not at home and by the time I get there I have completely forgotten what it was I wanted to say- This is not the case today. I have, however, altered what I was originally going to say.
Originally I wanted to rave about my favorite bread. I love Grandma Sycamore's Bread. It far exceeds the quality and taste of other breads. Even those that are cheaper knock-offs of the bread, like the Macey's Farm Bread or others, can never reach the quality that good old Granny Sycamore has produced. But, like I said, that was my original intent. It wasn't till I was staring at my fresh new loaf and admiring it's squishy yet light fluffiness that I realized there is a flaw in this bread!!!
Sure it tastes good and sure it's like heaven on the mouth, but how can they get away with labeling this bread as "home-maid"? What does that even mean? First I thought that it was queer that they would have that dash, or dot, or diamond in the middle of the word. Isn't homemaid one word? Well, it turns out it's not even a real word-I know, it's shocking! The correct word is "homemade" or "home-made" the use of "maid" in this sense would be completely wrong...unless it was intentional.
I've decided that it was clear that sweet innocent GS (that's Grandma Sycamore) was trying to pull one on the American public. She knew that most ignorant people would look over her slight misprint in a name and assume that this bread was made at home, or locally. Those that would question could easily think that it was just a cuter form of the word and therefore more marketable. It's only those who really want to look into something- probably more than they should- my case in point- that could see the harsh undertones that this word produces. It's clear to me know that GS is making a statement with this word. Maids are female servants- we're not a gender biased nation so she's referring to both men and women- servants and the lowest of the low- who is often referred to as a servant? Slaves! GS is making a statement for slavery. She wants the old ways of mass producing to return so that she can profit more by reducing production cost. This is not a single instance where these statements are being made in food. Look at Mrs. Butterworth? and Aunt Jamima. There is a conspiracy in the food industry to subtly bring the issue of slavery back into our nation, and I will not stand for it.

That is why (and it pains me to say it) I am boycotting Grandma Sycamore's Bread and all other products that I can somehow relate to Slavery. I will not, no I cannot stand for this kind of treatment in our country! My hope is that all American's all over the world will gather together and rise up in defiance of these corporations that are trying to change our way of life! Stand free Americans! Stand Free!